Do You Really Love Yourself? Let’s See!
Ask anyone and they’ll tell you they love themselves, BUT are their actions falling in line with their words?
I’d venture to say that in most cases the answer would present some major separation. Because in todays world we have become so focused on external events and demands that we rarely if ever have any time to dedicate loving actions to our self.
Here is a list of 7 behaviors and actions that will provide a good indicator as to how loving you really are to yourself. The good news is that if you don’t fair as well as you had hoped to – all you need to do is make a few small changes – and let self-love find it’s way home.
- Take ownership for your life?
- This can be very difficult based upon the education many of us received from family and friends. In many cases we had been taught that we are the victims of the circumstance, that it wasn’t “ME” that created the problem, but more so a chain of unfortunate external events that caused our loss or hardship. The key to increased self love is to own it all, and have the courage to accept that it was our decisions that ultimately created the situation we are in – positively or negatively. Once we accept that we are the master of our destiny, we will become much more aware of our choices and actions and how they impact our life. When we own it, we can change it!
- Choose your friends wisely.
- The company we keep dramatically impacts our life, and who we become. If you associate with people that blame, and complain, chances are that even if you didn’t complain and blame to begin with, you will soon pick up these behaviors, which are definite signs of people that do not love themselves. If you wish to love yourself – blaming and complaining are not a part of your life, because positive people look for solutions and then take the action to improve their life and the lives of those around them. Birds of a feather flock together – choose your flock wisely!
- Never stop learning.
- A sure sign of self-love is the desire to expand and grow as a person. Self-inspired education fulfills our deepest desire to evolve. Those that continue to learn, feel they have more to contribute and it’s in the act of contributing/ giving back that we are blessed with the feeling of love. The more you know the more connected you will feel and folklore and wives tails will have less chance of negatively impacting your life! Education (formal or informal) is the pathway to freedom!
- Life is abundance.
- People that love themselves see the world, as a place of opportunity, a place where abundance flows and human potential is unlimited. There are always two sides to every situation and a sure sign of self-love is to see the side with positive opportunity. Scarcity is based upon fear, and fear is based upon loss. When you know that life is abundance, fear no longer determines the outcome of your life and love rushing to fill the void!
- Focus on what you can control.
- As mentioned above, when we blame or complain outside sources for contributing to the hardships in our life, we have given up control of our life. When we take control of our life, we are now in a position to manage each situation and are capable of applying solutions, that have the potential to resolve our hardships. It is the action of self-respect that affirms self-love.
- How’s your health.
- Our body is our temple. If we are not respecting our body by nourishing it with healthy foods and maintaining it with exercise, this is a sure sign of a shortage of self-love. Often you will hear “I just don’t have time!” WHY? If you put anything above your basic needs you are doing yourself a disservice that will fester as resentments towards others. The key is to “Add In” all the good stuff: fruits, vegetables, nuts, fish oil, a walk, stretching and strength training to name a few. You must become your #1 priority – NOT IN A SELFISH WAY – but in a self-serving way!
- You are perfect just the way you are.
- This point is not an opportunity to make an excuse for your lack of self-care. This point is to reassure you that your spirit and core being are perfect and equal to all other human beings. By being perfect it also means that you have the same opportunity to accomplish the same things as all other human beings similar to you. Your accomplishments are not a reflection of you, but more so a reflection of the time and effort you have devoted to mastering your talent. There is an old Buddhist saying “If anything is worth doing, do it with all your heart!” If you do anything to the best of your ability – you will never look back, comparing or questioning what you have done. When you have attained this best practice, you will be a peace with yourself, and self-love is sure to follow!
Frank Moffatt is the Founder and CEO of Your Second Fifty. An online educational community that provides inspirational educational through books, films, and online courses for those in their second fifty.